again...nothing. might as well be a frog

resting in the hills if nice. i mean...naz. like...it's naz, real naz. sometimes i wonder if this heaven things been around the whole time or if i had to find it myself. i only do this now because i saw another trailer for a movie by m. night schamalan or however you spell it. seems to be really well. discipline seems to pay off. yet it sometimes interferes with the paradiso that i try to maintain. but maybe on down the line i'll thank myself when i'm older. a cool thing to do would be to somehow encounter my future self in the near future so that that future me could tell me where not to go, what not to do, and so on. then maybe the future would be better?

yet, the life force dwindles as i write this. total stress on the cranium just for typing some keys. saw beauty and splendor today. lemme tell ya, just meditating on some things will bring you into contact with em. like heaven and paradise. if you can think of anything better, i'd like to hear about it. either way, i'm stuck in this writers' dilemma of not really wanting to make it a final career choice, yet continuing with it because...?

peace out.